Three years

Nate and I have been together five-and-a-half years and today, married for three. The time has passed so quickly. We've lived in two states and five apartments/houses (not counting the places we lived before we moved in together). I can't tell you how many jobs (too many to count while I was part-timing here and there during grad school).

When I think about marriages, I know ours is a good one. We don't argue often, we agree on the big things, and we have fun. But it's still hard. Marriage is trying to join two lives together. Sometimes this happens effortlessly. Sometimes there's more stopping and starting, not because anyone is "wrong" or "right," but because there are two individuals with different ideas about life or the situation at hand.

Sometimes I see people getting married and it's obvious they have very idealized ideas about marriage. They think (even if they don't admit it) that their problems are solved, that life will be easier, that they'll never be lonely again. Sometimes these things are true ... and sometimes they aren't.

I guess what I'm thinking (and this probably doesn't sound very romantic) is that three years doesn't sound like a very long time to be married (my parents have been married for 34, for example; our neighbor across the street recently lost his wife before their 60th anniversary), but those three years have been good. And they've been well-earned.