Reflective Mood

Where to start? That's the problem with updating so infrequently. When you do update, there's so much to tell you don't know where to begin. I finished editing my thesis and turned it in on time. I finished the grant (just barely, at 5 p.m. just before the UPS guy arrived to pick up the package for overnight delivery). Right now, I'm in Albuquerque for a community radio conference.

I am not a radio person and have never worked in community radio, but because my employer has a lot of varied programs, I've written grants for performing arts, visual arts, arts and culture, youth, arts education, radio, and a bunch of other things I would never have imagined myself doing. I think this is a great experience for me because, as a first grant writing job, it's giving me a little taste of everything and will help me figure out what direction I might want to go in the future.

I've been thinking a lot about the future lately. I suppose it has a lot to do with finishing school and accomplishing one of the goals I had on my life to-do list. So maybe I'm thinking about what comes next and what I want to work towards. (I am always working towards something.) One is definitely finishing my novel. So that's a no-brainer. But beyond that, I'm thinking. I'm thinking about a lot of things.

While I have come to appreciate, enjoy, and even like Chicago a great deal (after hating it like poison when I first arrived), it still isn't ... it isn't quite right for me. Visiting Albuquerque for just a few days has shown me that there are certain things that are currently missing in my life.

My co-workers, as soon as we got off the plane, said "It's so quiet here." It unnerved them, I think. They've also said they could never life here. My reaction was, "thank God it's so quiet here." People are friendly. They have time to talk to you. I've already had about three substantial conversations with strangers today (lasting ten minutes or more) and a man dressed as Santa waved to me from his car when he saw me smiling at him. Of course, I waved back.

These are the small things I've missed. Friendly faces, sun, blue skies, being able to see for miles around you because the density and height of buildings doesn't block your view. I miss nature.

Unfortunately, both Nate and I have pretty good jobs and incomes where we currently live. And we've actually grown to appreciate the city. I love the multitude of restaurants, all the ethnic diversity, the plays, the museums, the lake, the outdoor concerts, and many of the great people I've met in the Chi. But there are some things that are missing ... how important are those things?

I'm not sure yet. But they're starting to feel more important.