While we're waiting for our house to sell, Nate and I are scoping out neighborhoods. One of our top criteria for the search is schools. Zoe is only one year old, but we were in our last house for four years (and had just started feeling like we had the house where we wanted it) and expect to be in this next house for that amount of time or longer. In four years, she will start kindergarten, so even though it does seem somewhat ridiculous to worry about schools now, I really don't feel like moving again in four years if we don't have to. Also I'm old now. Time moves fast for me and four years doesn't seem very long at all.
House buying/school researching brings up a lot of issues, many based on race and/or class (duh). Today I just happened upon some different things that made me think of my current dilemma. This article made me laugh. Especially this part: "I often thought, you know, if I wanted to make some money, I could start a private school. I could start it out of my own house in Van Nuys and call it 'The Cottage' or 'The Bungalow.' And you know we've got mulberry trees around here, and they're dying, but we could call it 'The Mulberry Cottage.' And we could start a newsletter."
I, like many parents right now, have a lot of conflicting feelings about public school and parenthood in general. We are so careful with our children, this generation. We feed them organic, we debate about vaccination schedules, we shelter them to an amazing degree. The voices I hear myself using with Zoe sometimes make me cringe. 'Cause I think of our parents and grandparents who, quite honestly, expected us as children to be more self-sufficient. We were the latchkey generation, after all.
What are we so afraid of? I ask myself that as I look at schools and judge their statistics. My experience is colored by the fact that I did attend a private (Catholic) school during childhood and I had a great experience. The class sizes were small so I developed very close friendships with both classmates and teachers and I got a lot of attention academically. I was challenged. When I went to a public school in junior high, I was easily two-three years ahead of my peers.
And public school was a hard adjustment. Did it make me more prepared for the real world? Probably. But there was a lot more violence, a lot more leniency for bad behavior, and just a lot crap that got in the way of learning. Where I went to Catholic school, talking back, fighting, etc. were not tolerated at all. When I went to a public school, that kind of thing took up a lot of valuable time. Even back then I found it annoying, having to wait for kids who couldn't behave to calm down so we could finally get to what it was we were supposed to be doing.
But I, like so many other parents right now, am trying to balance my personal ideals (supporting the community/public schools) with what I think will be good longterm for Zoe.
That's another part. I know I am more careful than I need to be. I view her as a sweet baby, needing my protection. But apparently at daycare she is an "alpha" girl and has bitten other children twice. (They think it was teething related since it was during a week when her teeth really seemed to be bugging her, but still.) I've seen her take a swipe at boys when they touch her toys or whatever. And both the previous and current daycares have said, "Zoe can take care of herself." I probably assume she's more delicate than she really is.
Tuesday
Friday
More Waiting
Overall things in Austin have been going well. Nate and I both like our new jobs and are getting settled into our new roles. In general the job situation turned out much better than I expected. We both assumed that moving from a larger to a smaller market, we might have to take pay cuts and/or positions we might not be thrilled with, just to get down here. Instead, we are doing better financially (Nate got a raise; I stayed exactly the same) and we are excited about the jobs we landed and future opportunities they provide.
The hard thing has been selling the house. We found a service in Dallas that is sort of like a house sitter. They specialize in finding people who need short-term situations and don’t want to sign a lease (like a fellow home owner who has sold a house but hasn’t found a new one yet, or maybe their new place is undergoing extensive renovations). They live in your house and pay utilities and maintain the lawn. They pay low rent in exchange for living in a nice space. You continue to pay the mortgage and have the peace of mind knowing that your yard is being maintained and your house isn’t sitting empty. The agreement also includes them keeping the house ready to show with an hour’s notice at all times and carrying insurance, should something awful happen.
In our situation, we got an extra benefit. We can’t have our pets while we stay with friends in Austin. Nate’s brother has our dog Walker but we couldn’t find a place for our cat. Roscoe is a pain in the ass. He hunts like a serial killer, is loud as hell and wants to be let in or out at four in the morning without fail, and he isn’t good with other cats. These things all limited our options for temporary placement and we knew that keeping him in a kennel would make him miserable (he insists on spending most of his time outside). So we were really lucky that the guy who’s staying in our house has two indoor cats and was happy to take care of Roscoe as well. That was a huge weight off our shoulders.
These are all good things. But now that we have a tenant (so to speak), he’s the one who gets the phone calls for showings. We have no sense how often our house is being shown or what is going on. We spoke with our realtor yesterday and she is going to send a report of recent showings. We also found out that someone saw our house last weekend and requested the seller’s disclosure report, which our agent says is usually a good sign.
So, we wait. That is something neither of us is very good at. I think we both get impatient, but not at the same time usually. Our agent thinks we should wait to see what happens after Labor Day because in her experience, things tend to slow down in July and August and pick up in the fall. I think we will wait a little longer, but are considering looking for an apartment. Staying with our friends has been great. They are very kind and generous. But living as a guest has also made our time in Austin seem sort of temporary. We don’t feel fully like residents yet and I suspect that having our own place would help us feel a little more settled. We’ll see what the coming weeks bring, but I’m not sure we’ll wait much longer. Nate and I aren’t that good at waiting patiently without taking any action. I can’t wait to feel like this is really my city again, and the place where Zoe will grow up.
The hard thing has been selling the house. We found a service in Dallas that is sort of like a house sitter. They specialize in finding people who need short-term situations and don’t want to sign a lease (like a fellow home owner who has sold a house but hasn’t found a new one yet, or maybe their new place is undergoing extensive renovations). They live in your house and pay utilities and maintain the lawn. They pay low rent in exchange for living in a nice space. You continue to pay the mortgage and have the peace of mind knowing that your yard is being maintained and your house isn’t sitting empty. The agreement also includes them keeping the house ready to show with an hour’s notice at all times and carrying insurance, should something awful happen.
In our situation, we got an extra benefit. We can’t have our pets while we stay with friends in Austin. Nate’s brother has our dog Walker but we couldn’t find a place for our cat. Roscoe is a pain in the ass. He hunts like a serial killer, is loud as hell and wants to be let in or out at four in the morning without fail, and he isn’t good with other cats. These things all limited our options for temporary placement and we knew that keeping him in a kennel would make him miserable (he insists on spending most of his time outside). So we were really lucky that the guy who’s staying in our house has two indoor cats and was happy to take care of Roscoe as well. That was a huge weight off our shoulders.
These are all good things. But now that we have a tenant (so to speak), he’s the one who gets the phone calls for showings. We have no sense how often our house is being shown or what is going on. We spoke with our realtor yesterday and she is going to send a report of recent showings. We also found out that someone saw our house last weekend and requested the seller’s disclosure report, which our agent says is usually a good sign.
So, we wait. That is something neither of us is very good at. I think we both get impatient, but not at the same time usually. Our agent thinks we should wait to see what happens after Labor Day because in her experience, things tend to slow down in July and August and pick up in the fall. I think we will wait a little longer, but are considering looking for an apartment. Staying with our friends has been great. They are very kind and generous. But living as a guest has also made our time in Austin seem sort of temporary. We don’t feel fully like residents yet and I suspect that having our own place would help us feel a little more settled. We’ll see what the coming weeks bring, but I’m not sure we’ll wait much longer. Nate and I aren’t that good at waiting patiently without taking any action. I can’t wait to feel like this is really my city again, and the place where Zoe will grow up.
Monday
Five Years
Four rings
Three cities
Six jobs
Two apartments
Two houses
Three pets
and one baby later ... we're still here.
Friday
Peer Group
The advantage of working with people who are all within 2-3 years of each other in age: Friday afternoon mix includes "Baby Got Back" and your co-worker turns it up.
"I like big butts and I cannot lie!"
TGIF.
"I like big butts and I cannot lie!"
TGIF.